On March 8th, our son, Breckin was playing in our hay barn (this is an 8x8x8 foot shed), swinging off of the rafters like he did so often and ended up getting caught in the baling twine, accidentally hanging himself. I got home from the Doctor’s office with my youngest and saw him about 10 minutes after I had talked to the kids on the phone… Oh my, that was something that a mother should NEVER see.
My older kids jumped into action, calling 911 and performing CPR. They were on the other side of the house, getting ready for our yard sale and heard me screaming when I got out of the car. I fully believe that it was divine guidance as none of them had ever learned CPR before. Sheriff’s arrived along with fire and ambulance. … They rushed Breckin to the local hospital where they loaded him onto a helicopter bound for Phoenix Children’s Hospital.
My house was marked as a crime scene. CPS was called and showed up to make sure that my children weren’t being abused. My children, my family, all interviewed over and over again. When we hit the local hospital, they interviewed me as well. They were looking for a suicide note… something to tell them that this was intentional. … They found nothing because Breckin was a happy child, he was looking forward to 4H expo, he had waved at me several hours before, 60 minutes before had drawn his entry for the county fair book with my other children while I was at the doctor’s office. He was looking forward to our big vacation in the fall.
Larry, my dad and myself headed to Phoenix. Several hours after we arrived, a neurosurgeon came out and finally talked to us. Breckin was barely alive, but had significant brain damage from lack of oxygen and would never wake up. We had to make some VERY crazy decisions that a parent should never have to make. We were called early the next morning by the Sheriff’s office that they deemed this an accident. (something that I already knew!) We are still waiting for CPS to finish “their” investigation.
My dad, our pastor Pastor Ron from the Height’s Church, Larry and myself were able to talk, to pray, to figure out what we needed to do. We opted to donate Breckin’s organs to help other children. Our thought was that if we couldn’t have our Breckin on this earth, maybe someone else could. I was never an organ donor person before… But suddenly, our logic made perfect sense. We were giving him 72 hours… 3 days before we made any decisions. (Click here for significant “3-days” in the bible.) I wouldn’t leave his side. I couldn’t. I wanted to be there as long as I could. I talked to him. I cried… I held his hand.
On March 11, 2017, the nurses bathed Breckin and had me climb into his bed to snuggle at about 3am…. 2 hours later, Breckin’s brain flatlined and we lost my Freckle Face. I cried, I screamed, I hugged my little man. Why us? Why? The doctors had to make several visits to officially call and even though we knew at about 5am he was gone, they officially called him at 3:32pm on March 11.
Through this, I have not lost my faith…. I am not angry with God… I am saddened, I am mourning and I at times can not stop crying. I miss him so badly that it hurts. My heart aches for him. I have been through the what ifs…. and I know that I would trade his place just to know that he was alive and happy…. But, God had other plans. And I know that I will see Breckin again. My faith is strong there.
I have received HATE emails, blocked calls, messages through facebook, many telling me what a horrible mom I am, how could I push this little boy to kill himself… How could the mom of the year have such a dark side. I have turned my phone off, I stopped taking messages. I can’t leave the house…. sometimes living in a small town is a great advantage, other times, it is the worst thing in the world. I know that Breckin was happy and healthy… I know that he loved to play tarzan and I know that this was an accident… a horrible accident. A HORRIBLE UNINTENTIONAL ACCIDENT.
I am tired of everyone asking me “what happened.” Thus, I wrote this post. It has been 19 days since his accident and 16 days since he passed. I don’t think that I will ever get the image of my son out of my head. The hole in my heart will never leave. My son is gone…
We did receive a call that Breckin was a positive match to a little 9 year old boy in California for a heart, an 8 month old girl for his liver, a 48 year old man and a 62 year old woman from Arizona for his kidneys and his lungs went to Cystic Fibrosis research and Pancreas to Juvenile Diabetes research. A light in the darkness!! Another mom would be rejoicing that her son would LIVE.
We had his services on March 18th at the Heights church… Our church family has been so giving, so helpful as have our true friends. The services were AMAZING. I am thankful for everyone at the church. We picked up his ashes last week and last Saturday ordered his headstone.
This has been the longest 3 weeks of my life. I will never meet Breckin’s wife or my grandchildren…. I will never have those little moments where he would sit and brush my hair, telling me about his day. I will never see my amazing son grow up.
We have several fundraisers going to make sure that the other kids are covered for 4H and the extra expenses.
There is a Go Fund Me account: https://www.gofundme.com/mazyfullmer-family-fund
And there is a facebook page for expo fee fundraiser for the kids at https://www.facebook.com/MazyFullmer-Expo-Projects-1682405738440671/
If you can’t donate (which we do not expect)… please pray for the family!
Here is the slide show from the Memorial.
Here is his obituary:
Breckin James Fullmer, age 11, was born Sept. 5, 2005, and left us all to be in Heaven with Jesus on March 11, 2017.
He entered into foster care on July 10, 2012, and was given a second chance in life at age 7 through his adoption on May 10, 2013, to Larry and Kristen Mazy Fullmer. He had the distinct opportunity to choose his new name, which means Freckles. It was one of his proudest moments to share this with others. Breckin was a caring, creative, hardworking and energetic boy. He was actively involved in the Chino Valley Breakaway Latigos 4-H group. He enjoyed 4-H and taking care of his animals, especially Snickers, his Lionhead rabbit.
At the 2016 Yavapai County Fair and Expo, Breckin earned a Grand Champion in rabbits, a Reserve Grand Champion in quail and a Red Ribbon for his rabbit Snickers. At home he also raised swine, dairy goats, bantam chickens, and muscovy ducks.
He was full of adventure, always dueling with lightsabers or playing action figures with his brothers. He also enjoyed riding his bike, roller skating and racing on his go cart. He even let his sisters paint his toenails, dress him up, play doll house, and have tea parties with them. He was a great middle brother in the family, playing with his three older and four younger siblings. His favorite possession in the world was his Red Ryder BB Gun given to him by his Nana and Poppie.
He often hiked with his dad on the weekends, sometimes up to 15 miles in one day, all throughout the back dirt roads of Chino Valley. He and his brother Trystan enjoyed finding treasures on the side of the road during those hikes to bring home to their mama. In addition to that, he was often found outside with his mama in her garden, picking and eating the fresh tomatoes and peas, which never made it inside for dinner.
Breckin’s favorite evening activities were either family game night or going to the movies and eating popcorn. He loved being a connoisseur of all foods, pizza being his all-time favorite.
Breckin always had a smile on his face, especially when he was up to no good, while plotting his grand adventures. He loved to sit and draw up a spectacular invention, color, or write a creative story. Oftentimes he was compared to the comic strip Family Circus, making his dotted line follow him through his adventurous day.
Breckin was homeschooled with his other siblings, where he would frequently make his siblings laugh and disrupt the teacher, his mama. His favorite subjects were math, science, art and of course, lunch. He especially enjoyed park day where he could run and play with his many friends from the Chino Valley/Paulden Homeschoolers group.
Breckin found a love for Christ by attending the Heights Church with his new family. He loved to dress up in a button down shirt, vest, and clip-on tie to attend the weekend’s evening service.
His caring heart led his family to continue foster care after his adoption. He always thought of others, so being an organ donor would have been something he would have wanted. That way he could pass on his caring heart to another child so they could receive a second chance in life as he did.
Breckin is survived by his parents, Larry and Kristen Mazy Fullmer of Chino Valley; his grandparents, David and Janet Mazy of Chino Valley; Gary L. Fullmer of Fairfield, Idaho; and Susan P. Fullmer of Apple Valley, Utah; his brothers and sisters, Shelby, Griffen, Elwyn, Berlyn, Rowan, Trystan and Rayleigh, all of Chino Valley; and many aunts, uncles and cousins.
Services for Breckin are Saturday, March 18, 2017, at 2 p.m. at the Heights Church, 2121 Larry Caldwell Drive Prescott, AZ 86301. In lieu of flowers, the family asks that you make a donation in Breckin’s name to Chino Valley Breakaway Latigos 4-H, 388 W Butterfield Road, #10, Chino Valley, AZ 86323, or Horses with H.E.A.R.T., P.O. Box 2427, Chino Valley, AZ 86323.
Information provided by survivors.